Self-Care
When thinking about self-care I think there are a lot of misconceptions. Before getting started I’m going to touch on what self-care is and what it isn’t.
Self-care to me is providing care for yourself to destress. It’s about catering to yourself and doing activities that benefit your mental health. Yes, knowing the definition of self-care is important but I think knowing what self-care isn’t is just as important. It isn’t a chore. You shouldn’t feel like you have to designate a day in the week to take care of yourself. When self-care stops feeling restorative and helpful, and starts feeling like a burden, something isn’t right. Self care should never feel like a job.
I, myself started having a self-care day once a week. I’ve been trying this out for about a month, and I can honestly say that I am failing miserably. I’m not going to sit here and lie to you and tell you that I’m doing a fabulous job and that my self-care days have changed my life. There were a lot of things that I did wrong in the month of me trying to figure out what my perfect self-care day would look like. One of the reasons I personally feel like I failed was because I was trying too hard. I was trying to have a stereotypical self-care day that you’d see online with a face mask and some nail polish. I’m not saying that this method won’t work for someone but I can assure you it won’t work for a lot of us. I tried too hard to have the perfect self-care day without thinking hard enough of what self-care is and what the purpose of this act is. Most importantly I didn’t ask my body and mind what it wanted and what it needed – I didn’t listen to them.
I gave too much thought to the wrong areas. I didn’t come up with a plan I just assumed I knew what I was doing and went all in. I got really cocky and that’s where I went wrong. Looking through articles that talked about the writer’s personal self-care routine, I tried to implement what they did into my routine and that was a mistake. When planning your own day, you should think about what calms you and the best way to relax your mind and body. Everyone is different, which is why trying to force someone else’s routine onto yourself just won’t work. All it will do is discourage you from having a day to take care of yourself because you just don’t feel relaxed afterwards.
The best ways to figure out what’s going to work for you, is to take a minute and really think about the things you enjoy doing and what helps your mind take a break from life. I know for myself I love to write, paint, and swim. The best way for me to get the most out of my self-care day is to try and make it a priority to do those three things. What I would suggest is to pick a day in the week that works best for you and to use that first day to make a list. Make a list of the things you love and the things that calm you and make those a priority.
Never feel like you should designate a day to self-care. I use Mondays as my day because I never have anything to do Mondays. However, if you can’t use an entire day for self-care have a self-care hour. Anything is better than nothing. Do try your best to have a schedule to ensure that you have some time to yourself at least once a week, but don’t diminish it to once a week. If you’ve already had your self-care day on a Monday and you just really needed another one on that Thursday GO FOR IT. You deserve to take care of yourself. It’s okay to say no to friends and work, and to say yes to yourself.
Self-care is one of those things we don’t give enough thought to, and I can understand that we’re all busy. However, life becomes stressful and I really do think that taking care of you is the best way to ensure that you don’t burn out, and you are always your best self.